The best blogs happen in the shower…..

For reasons unknown to me I always write the best blogs (not really write but think them out) in the shower but then can't remember all of it by the time I get to the computer. I have a really good one today though so I hope I can write it out as good as it was in my head. It doesn’t really have anything to do with workouts, nutrition, or weight loss but has everything to do with the journey I am on to better myself. So here it goes.

If you have ever seen the movie “Never Been Kissed” you will understand the term “lemming”. I realized today (while in the shower of course) that I have allowed myself to walk around for years as a lemming, a follower, a member of the crowd with no originality or voice of my own, one who speaks or repeats what I have been told, a tool (as defined by Urban Dictionary). You might wonder why I am coming to this realization now, well allow me to tell you. I have a really good friend who is very opinionated (not in a bad way). He has his opinions and does not shy away from sharing them. I admire this about him because I recognize that I have tried to win peoples approval and not ruffle any feathers for so long that I just accepted others opinions and ways of life as my own without taking into account my own thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. I just took people on their authority and word rarely expressing my own opinions. I just followed in order to fit in and to be liked. I quit forming and expressing my own opinions. I became a lemming.
I have always had my own opinions but for the first time in years I actually speak my mind without censoring my opinions for fear of being rejected. I would like to thank my opinionated friend for challenging me to leave my lemming ways and for letting me see that I have people in my life that want to hear my opinions even if we don’t agree and we can still respect each other (at least on all matters except Justin Beiber, but then again we do agree on that subject).
So the moral of this short but sweet blog: Have friends that challenge you to be better, the ability to respect each others differing opinions is healthy, and I need to create a way to blog while in the shower!

Resolutions Smesolutions!!!!!!

Obviously I have not kept up with my resolution to blog weekly……..maybe I should just try for monthly!! I am stranded at my house and have been for 3 days due to the Snowpocalypse 2011, I decided now would be a great time for an update. So here is goes.
In the month of January I lost 7 lbs and burned a LOT of calories, 13,472 to be exact and completed 28 workouts! Not too shabby for 1 month. I know I have lost inches but I just haven’t measured! My nutrition is still a bit out of whack but I am working on it. I did last 21 days before I started again with the fast food. (However due to snow I have been fast food free since Monday) Everything else is going well, I am still attending bootcamp at the crack of dawn and of course Zumba-ing most days. If you haven’t heard from me much it is because I am so very sleepy!! Amazingly enough I am usually in bed by 10:30. Well that is it for the update but I will be posting more blogs over the weekend I’m sure.

Tying up lose ends

So there are a few changes going on right now. I have started a boot camp on Monday, Wednesday, and Fridays at 5AM. Yes, you read correctly I am actually up, dressed, and at a location not my bed by 5AM three mornings a week. I am starting a 8 week Biggest Loser contest at the Boot Camp with my cousins. I WILL win. I am also joining a Biggest Loser Contest at Runner’s World, I WILL win this one, too. I might be doing the couch to 5K with Runner’s World if I can fit it into my schedule.

I am not doing Weight Watchers, it just wasn’t working for me. I am however following a meal plan that is pretty simple and healthy. I have no clue how much I weigh or what my measurements are but I will let you know next week because I will have them done for the contests and then I will post them.

There are a few other thing going on that I am going to write about but this will do for now (seeing that I have to be up at 4AM). I will say that one of my New Year’s Resolutions is to blog weekly and I am going to try my hardest to get them written. I have some great ideas. My blogs are going to be less about the goals, weight, and plans for the week and more about the experiences that I am having. There will be more like the spin class and boobs blogs. Let me know what you think.

I am so very excited about what 2011 has in store for me. This is going to be a great year.

2010 in Review-ish

I was going to type up a “year in review” however if you are reading this you pretty much know what my year was like. In the first few months I did nothing but seclude myself and watch tv, in April I had a car wreck and bought a new car, in May I went to Chicago to see Glee, during the summer I did more sitting, secluding, and tv watching. In August I realized I deserve better, in September I began my love affair with Zumba, in October I became a new creation, in November I went to San Francisco, and in December I started boot camp and realized how lucky I am to have the friends that I have in my life. That pretty much sums it up.

I really would like to shine a little light on the people that have really made this year great for me! This was the year that I reconnected with old friends and made some amazing new friends. This year my life became richer and I was challenged to be a better person because of the people in my life. So with that I would like to thank a few people.
Keira- thank you for not giving up on me and for nudging me without pushing. I am so glad that you are a part of my life.
Dawn- I love our Saturdays and conversations. I had missed having you in my life and I’m pretty sure that you are never allowed to go away again.
Lisa-I love that I can see you once in 2 years and we pick up where we left off. I admire the fact that you always tell me what I need to hear instead of what I want to hear. I am very proud of you and I miss you!!
Missy- You wisdom and heart always amaze me. I learn more lessons from you FB statuses than I do anywhere or from anyone else.
Burgan- I am pretty sure that without your constant support and willingness to try any new fitness class with me, I would still be sitting on my couch watching the TV. Thank you so much and remember that 2011 is the year of the Shimmy for us!!
Mandy- I LOVE talking to you. Thank you for answering all my crazy questions, you are like my younger-Big sister. You make my days go by faster with a lot more laughter.
Kirby- You have one of the greatest hearts and the best sense of humor. You are my fashion guru. Thank you for not letting me continue in my life as a fashion tragedy. The girls thank you, too. Your friendship means the world to me.
Rob- Somehow you bring out a side of me that I had forgotten about. With you I can be completely myself. I love that we are friends.
Jacque- I am so proud of you and I am glad that we are on this journey together. You are a great friend (and cousin).
Rhonda- I so very much love hanging out with you. You are wise beyond your years and have s great heart. Your friendship means the world to me. I am so thankful the you are a part of my life.
Team Melissa- You guys and gals are great. I could not ask for better support and encouragement. Thank you for your calls, comments, and emails. I love that each of you are a part of my life.

An Update.......it's only been a month.

So I have been really bad at blogging over the past month but I have to tell you it is because I am actually working out. I’ll wait a few minutes for you to pick yourself up off the floor……………seriously I am at the gym everyday but Sunday and Thursday, however that is even fixing to change because the Y has added more Zumba classes. Well that and I went to San Francisco for 9 days, where I did not work out as planned but I did average 4 miles of walking a day (which led to a lot of ankle issues). I can’t tell you that I have lost any weight (I am currently at 272) because I really haven’t but I have lost inches. And by the way that would be 7 FREAKIN INCHES!!

I went to Zumba tonight for the first time since I left for vacation and I realized I missed it so much. (I cannot believe that I, Melissa Hueste, just actually typed that) I love just dancing and having fun. I am excited that I will have more opportunities to go to classes and I have even been told that there is a Zumba game for the Wii (Christmas present idea if anyone feels like getting me one or Just Dance, I want that one too). I also started going to a belly dance class, well I went to one, and I plan on going back. It is not just belly dance but it is also an abs class. In that class I learned that my abs are sad and I don’t have any muscle tone in my butt, so the shimmy of the butt is very difficult and I am pretty sure that my left butt cheek doesn’t work at all but I will get there! And did I mention that in belly dance class you get to wear a jingly wrap/belt!!!!

So I have to workout portion of things under control and now I just need to get on board with the nutrition. I had joined Weight Watchers but I am not really excited about the program. I have 3 months left on my membership and Weight Watchers just changed their program so as of December 11th (I have to wait for payday to buy more groceries) I will follow the new program and just see. Until then I am going to live on the Healthy Choice meals I have purchased and whatever I have saved up in the freezer along with fruits and veggies. Any nutrition tips, menus, shopping lists, and recipes are more than welcome.

I will keep you updated and I am going to try to be better about blogging weekly. I will also try to write a few more blogs this weekend.

The BOOBS Blog

Yep I am writing a blog about my boobs, so for any gentlemen that might be reading you might just want to stop here or keep reading, I mean I am putting it actually them out there!

On with the blog. About 4 weeks ago, my amazing, sweet, tell-it-like-it-is friend Kirby look at me and said “Now that is a tragedy” my response “what, I am wearing the best pants I have, I can’t help it if they sag” and her response was not in words but was the simple action of grabbing a hold of my bra strap and hoisting one of “my girls” into its appropriate place. That one simple action was the beginning of a huge change.
So a couple days later I ventured out to purchase new bras, however according to Kirby I was only allowed to purchase bras with underwire and I had to have assistance. So off I went. I actually asked a sales clerk to assist me and I went to the dressing room with about 8 different bras in a bunch of different sizes (apparently not only did my bras have no support but they were also the wrong size, however they were really comfortable). So I tried the first one on (that I could actually get clasped) and put a shirt on over it and stood looking in AWE at the mirror. I was amazed at the difference. I walked out of the store with 4 new bras and a completely different attitude.

See here is the deal I have big boobs, I have always had the big breastases and I never really liked them. As I gained weight they grew, they sagged, and then they just seemed to be an extension of my stomach. But then I put on the bra and you know what, they don’t have to sag or be an extension of my stomach they can be in the appropriate place like all the other normal boobs in the world. The thing is that I could have tried on an underwire bra forever ago but this was the first time that I was able to try one on look at myself in the mirror and think “Dang, I look good”. It is the first time that dealing with the pain of the bra (because those wires are not comfortable) was actually worth it because I believe that I am actually worth it and that I can look good.

So the next day I wore the bra to work, Kirby was proud of me and people noticed a difference and not just in the way I looked but in the way that I carried myself and my attitude. I felt good and I also stared at my boobs all day. I was just amazed by them. To be honest 3 weeks later, I still find myself staring…..

I didn’t write this blog so that the next time you see me you will feel compelled to check out my boobs but because this was a turning point for me. I can put on my new bra and feel good about myself and I can wear all of the shirts that I own that have the empire seams in them and my boobs are above not below the seam (who knew that could happen?). A few weeks before this bra incident I had decided that I needed to start dressing as the person I want to be not as the person that I currently am. I literally sat in my car one night and said “I don’t wanna be a scrub cuz scrubs don’t get no love” and then immediately sent a text to my sister asking her to help me pick out new clothes and I went home and threw out everything that was too big or just didn’t line up for the image of myself that I want to portray and I am slowly but surely getting great clothes and changing the way I look and I love it because I am learning to love myself, boobs included. And that my friends is the Boobs Blog!

An Adventure at Spin Class!!

CAUTION: The following is a true story, details are graphic and viewer discretion is advised.
About a month ago I embarked on a new journey that led me to my first ever spin class. Spin class is taught by Kitty, who I now refer to as “Northside Jillian”. Upon arrival at the class I chose my bike and Kitty helped me adjust the settings and explained how to use the bike. My amazing friend Burgan, who was brave enough to encounter this experience with me, was also new to spinning and got the same instructions. So as we were getting our instructions Kitty explained that the seat of the bike would be uncomfortable but as time wears on you will get use to it (liar). And how exactly do I get use to it? Do I get calluses? Because I really do not think that hoo-ha calluses are attractive, not that it matters for me at this time, but still it just sounds icky and wrong in general.
She also explained that the seat has a section called the “horn,” it is this said section that literally jabs into your woman parts and makes you cry like a baby. I do not know why I needed to know that it is called a horn, I mean I cannot think of one horn that would ever be pleasant to sit on ( I had pictures of sitting on a trumpet dancing in my head) and believe me the horn on a spin bike is about as far away from pleasant as you can get. The actual purpose of the horn (other than pain) is to let you know if your seat adjustment is right because apparently when you are going uphill (standing and pedaling) the horn should hit just below your butt.
So now we were ready for class, well it did take me about 5 minutes to get my feet strapped into the pedals because it is hard when you have a rather large stomach to bend over and strap your feet into a moving pedal while sitting on a friggin HORN. But none the less I was strapped in and ready to go. At 6:15 with Burgan, 2 other girls, Kitty, and me the class started. There was loud music and the no lights (this is a good thing because a very dim room made me feel a lot less self conscious). I was determined to love spin class because they do it on BL so surely I can do it, too. Well by 6:19PM I wanted to die and we hadn’t even changed the resistance or started uphill yet. By 6:21 I was pretty sure that I was dead and in Hell. I have never felt such pain before, I was convinced that I was going to pass out and fall off my bike, which would be even more painful because my feet were strapped in. I tried to do the uphills but when I stood up I couldn’t pedal so I decided that I would just crank up some resistance and sit and continue to be violated by the friggin HORN. And then it happened about 15 minutes in (yes, people all that happened in the first 15 minutes) Northside Jillian said “it is your lucky day because on Wednesdays…..we do squats” My mind shouted “what the Hell” my lady parts rejoiced at getting off the horn. So I got off my bike and did squats, I don’t know how many squats because I was just focused on not dying. And then back on the bike, (which took me longer because that whole big stomach and strapping my feet in thing) and we did it all over again. I tried to keep up and Kitty was encouraging (and probably fearful that I was going to die in her class, I was pretty sure I could hear her trying to recall exactly how to perform CPR). Burgan was a rock and would encourage me as we were going. I tried to keep up but I did not try any more uphills but I DID NOT EVER STOP MOVING. After the 2nd set of squats (I do know that we added more squats each time because at the last set we did 30 friggin squats) I got back on the bike and started chanting “I will not quit”. I thought I was just saying it in my head until I realized that I was saying it out loud with ever movement of the pedals. I will not quit, I will not quit, I will not quit, I will not quit, I will not quit. It was literally the only reason I kept going through the 3rd and final sets of squats and spinning and then it was over. I really did not know what to do at that point because I did not know if I would be able to walk to my car. I was in so much pain my legs hurt, my hands hurt from gripping the handlebars, my crotch hurt, I wondered why anyone chooses to do this to themselves.
Kitty told me that I did a good job and I left the class room with Burgan. Burgan told me I did a good job. I told me I did a good job even though all I really did was sit and pedal and do some half-ass squats but I did not quit. I burned 700 calories in those 45 minutes. I got in my car and called my dad, he answered the phone and I responded with a sobbing “I just did a spin class”, I was bawling to the point that my dad thought I was hurt and needed to pull over. I was shocked by the crying and I felt like a BL contestant but the crying was from many things: PAIN, relief that it was over, PAIN, exhaustion, my violated hoo-ha, but most importantly it was a break thru, I did not quit, I was proud of myself. It was literally one of the hardest things I have ever done and there were parts that were embarrassing and shameful (strapping my feet in) but I did not give up or walk out, I did not stop when I was hurting or when I couldn’t keep up, I DID NOT QUIT. And I decided then and there that would not be my last spin class. My dad talked to me for a while and told me that he was proud of me. It made all the difference in the world.
When I got home I took a shower thinking that would help. WRONG, nothing could help the pain and soreness. I honestly believe that the pain is equal to child birth. Oh My Jesus, it hurt to stand, sit, pee, walk, any movement in general hurt. The running joke at work was that I was going to have a prayer vigil for my undercarriage. But you know 2 days later I went to Zumba and the movement and stretching helped. I will go back to spin class, probably not in my near future as I would like to focus on my stomach and abs before I go back. But the important thing for me is that I plan on going back, I know that the pain doesn’t last forever, I have talked to people who have assured me that I will not get callused, and one person that explained to me that it is good to be toned and fit in all areas of our bodies (that thought is still kinda weird to me). Most importantly I have worked out consistently ever since that class. There is no turning back this is how my life is now, I will be healthy, that I can control. Sometimes it might hurt (and I might feel violated by the horn) but in the end I will feel good about myself.
So who wants to go spin with me?

PS- I have been told that the first class is always the worst. My friend told me that if you make it thru the first class and go back you will start to love it. I kinda doubt that I am going to love it but who knows, anything is possible.